Here In Your Charms or, Infatuation Street

Mark it by the words of a Hellogoodbye song,
Years of feeling queasy are replaced by a loud throng.
Beating in my head I know my heart will keep in time,
As we’re swaying and displaying open minds to soggy sunshine.

Been so locked up, caged, afraid to fly;
You give me wings, these feathered things,
As sincere as our goodbyes.
Hello, so nice to be you again.

As we all know by now, I’m terrible at keeping up with … anything really: I started my 365 project on St. Patty’s Day and probably have a week’s worth of photos, and I began this blog with the intention of weekly updates and find myself working on entry number three. Regardless, I’m posting now:

It’s been a busy month (April/May) for me, but it’s the type of busy that makes you feel accomplished. Recently I was invited to be the lyricist/vocalist for a band called Kamboombox, and I couldn’t be more stoked, amped, psyched, and excited! Currently the band consists of Paul (To Everyone), Paul’s brother John, and Damien (No Talent Show, Broke By Sunday, Fighting Jamesons); a talented mesh of phenomenal artists – I am so lucky. While being in a band with Damien is an enthralling subject all it’s own, the main reason I’m ultra-hyper over Kaboombox is the style of music we play: video games meet J-pop. Music is my world, and poppy music, well, it makes me happy. I can’t help it! We’re even talking about going all out with costumes/clothing to match our style. Hopefully I’ll have show dates for all of my lovely followers soon; I expect to see each and every one of you at my gigs! Or else!

Now, back to Damien. Heh, for those who know me closely you’ve been hearing that name an awful lot lately, and I do apologize,  but I can’t seem to help myself. Damien, Damien, Damien! There, maybe it’s out of my system… okay, not likely. To fully understand y’all need as much backstory as I can give without A) boring you to tears, and B) pissing off my bassist: It’s been ten years since he and I first met at a gig at Alpha Music, when Shannon and I used to follow his band around as proper (high school) groupies tend to do; I have been enamored, infatuated, obsessed, whatever! with the boy ever since.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy all musicians equally, but there’s something I can’t define about Damien that has me so ga-ga over his goofy ass. Years ago we went out, but not really. It reminds me of the line in Grease, a bit, “We didn’t go together, we just went together,” because he nor I ever gave name to what we had being perfectly content to ride it out until we got bored. No one got bored. Feelings evolved. Shit got weird. I can only speak for myself, but I believe that Damien is like-minded: I have horrible commitment issues. “I stay committed like one foot in, one foot out.” So I think both of us got a little wary about caring for one another. The only difference is as I got older I wanted to care for Damien, he didn’t. Today I’m 100% alright with that, but there’s a part of my heart that will always be head over heels for that man.

With that in mind, you can start to fathom how I must have felt getting a phone call from him saying that not only did he want me to sing for him, but he wanted me IN HIS BAND. Not only that, but he “loves my voice”. So, yeah, I’ve been tiptoeing around cloud nine for weeks now, careful not to fall through, but now I think it’s time to just jump on in! I know, for a fact, that a majority of my love for Damien stems from how he makes me feel, and if I could accomplish these feelings without him I’m willing to bet a lot of the love would fade quickly, hah.

Wednesday, Cinco de Mayo, Damien and I spent the day running around, writing music, and then partying it up at a bar called Manhattan’s while his cover band jammed and, for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was me again. Back when we were “together” it was something every week like that – parties at night, adventures during the day, and fun fun fun, and I didn’t realize how much I missed that until I experienced it again. Part of the appeal of being a musician is that same aspect: getting out, having fun, making friends, partying it up and Damien brings the best of that out no matter where he is. I’ve missed that! And I’m going to get it back. You just watch.